It should come as no surprise that I’ve been thinking quite a bit about marriage lately.
One bit I wanted to share is the song Little Talks by Of Monsters and Men. It struck me as almost an exact description of my marriage recently (though the roles the two portray had switched between my wife and I at different times). The song is a duet with the woman questioning whether the relationship is over contrasted by the man wanting to save it. They capture the feelings of loneliness and abandonment in a marriage that is failing.
Your gone, gone, gone away
I wish you’d disappear
All that’s left is a ghost of you
That part haunts me. One of the things my wife said to me as we started the process of reconciling was, “I want my best friend back.” Distance can happen easily during troubles, until one day you realize you have lost touch with your spouse. Remembering back to those earlier times of being connected to the other is like seeing a ghost, and you ask yourself where that person went.
That is not how this one ends though. I love this song because of the hope. She wants to leave, but realizes the bonds still there.
Now wait, wait, wait for me
Please hang around
I’ll see you when I fall asleep
Don’t listen to a word I say
The screams all sound the same
How many times has someone said “leave me alone” when they really meant “come back to me?”
Though the truth may vary, this
Ship will carry our
bodies safe to shore
The first line speaks of the different perspectives the two have. Each person sees the problems differently.
I love the second part of the refrain, “This ship will carry our bodies safe to shore.” How Catholic is that? There is safety and security within marriage, it is a sacrament after all. The imagery is wonderful. Ships can get rocked and battered in storms, but a good marriage can be trusted to get through the storm, safe to the other side. Truly a blessing.
Here is the whole thing: