Catholic Dads » Rick

“How to Raise a Juvenile Delinquent”

Rick — Mon, 04 Apr 2011 00:00:52 +0000

The police station in a Texas city once posted a list of rules entitled “How to Raise a Juvenile Delinquent” as:

1. From infancy, give a child everything he wants. He’ll believe that the world owes him a living.

2. Pick up after your child. He’ll learn to pass his duties on others.

3. Side with him always even against authorities. Tell him they’re prejudiced against him because he is a “free spirit” and is never wrong. This will make him disregard anyone who corrects him or limits his behavior.

4. Prepare for grief as your child will end up in jail or have a messed up life. A child who never hears the word no has a limited understanding of the word yes.

In fact, St. John Bosco’s “No” is preferred by the kids to Bl. Michael Rua’s “Yes”. St. John Bosco takes the time to listen to the request. Then he kindly explains why the request is not good for the boy. So, the young feels loved despite the rejection or the limitation. ( Bl. Michael Rua is cold by temperament. So, his “yes” can appear to be impersonal- even if he is a holy man.)

More from http://divine-ripples.blogspot.com/

The price of education vs. ignorance

Rick — Sat, 26 Feb 2011 15:20:35 +0000

There’s a lot of noise about the higher education bubble – like it’s not worth going to college anymore.

Though the price of education is expensive, the price of ignorance is even more. So, there are quantitative and qualitative differences. There’s the pay and considerations for advancement but there are other things i.e. perspective, attitude and confidence.

All things being equal, the college grad will be given more opportunities for entry and advancement because those credentials reflect certain qualities e.g. mental ability, diligence, discipline, industry among others.

Going back to the bubble, I think it is not in the community and state colleges because those are relatively inexpensive. And the ivy leagues will still be worth it depending on the program because if you’re a Wharton MBA or a Harvard Law graduate, then all the Fortune 500 companies will roll out the red carpet and pay you more than enough to recoup your investment. The bubble is in expensive private colleges or programs that are not that marketable.

Bottom line, if one can afford the time then there are economical ways to fund higher education e.g. grants, loans, scholarships and savings programs. An example of a saving program is the 529 account where contributions can be deducted from state taxes and the benefits can be transferred to another beneficiary – just in case your kid gets a scholarship and you can give it to someone else. The concept is like an IRA but even better because one can purchase a 2 or 4 year degree program at the current rate to use 18 years from now. Also, in the 529 program, one can opt to invest the money in a funds and hope that it grows as fast as the cost of education and not have any financial meltdowns that can wipe away the savings. I would go with paying for the tuition at today’s rate and having that program ready – to shield it from the market volatilities. I guess the risk there is if the state goes bankrupt. Anyway, this post is meant as a guide or pointer to explore the 529 programs. It varies by the state.

Understanding that led to friendship among my boys.

Rick — Sun, 30 Jan 2011 19:10:59 +0000

A friend invited my son Billy, 7, to a birthday party at Dave and Busters – an amusement center.

Besides food and drink, all the kids got a $25 card to use at the games there.

At the end of the celebration, Billy collected a small bucket full of tickets.

He redeemed them for 2 water pistols, instead of getting a bigger prize for himself.

When he got home, he gave one of the guns to Bob, 11, his older brother.

At first they were enjoying a friendly game when things got out of hand. Bob overpowered Billy in the shoot out and had him cornered. It turned ugly.

Billy ended up crying miserably. He went to his dad and told him who saddened he was that Bob used his very gift to shoot him mercilessly.

The wise old father called Bob over and said words that would make the two brothers, the best of friends. ”You must understand Bob”, the father started, “that Billy owns nothing in this world all his life. The tickets that he won at Dave and Busters are the only things that he truly owns and earned. And rather than getting himself a nice toy, he thought of you and the fun times that you two will spend playing together. That is why he got two water pistols. He wanted to enjoy your company. What hurt his feelings was that you went beyond playing and tortured him with it – specially when he was cornered and unable to shoot back or run. It was neither fun nor friendly anymore. And I guess he felt sad that you did that to him despite his gift.

Bob understood how Billy looked up to him and enjoyed his company. From then on, he was no longer mean to Billy.

Just another baby girl from a grateful dad

Rick — Sat, 29 Jan 2011 23:34:28 +0000

Sophia. 6 lbs. 20 inches.

I wanted to name her after her mom. But my wife decided to choose a name that has a profound meaning in my life instead.

Cfr. http://divine-ripples.blogspot.com/2009/09/our-lady-wore-blue-jeans.html

She’s our fifth and of course I see the costs associated with preparing them for life. But God who has began this will see it to completion. I’ll just have to keep asking for our daily bread.

I thank God for her safe delivery.

Here are 3 of her siblings awaiting her arrival.

HOW TO REALLY LOVE A CHILD

Rick — Sat, 01 Jan 2011 16:32:53 +0000

HOW TO REALLY LOVE A CHILD
Be there. say yes as often as possible. let them bang on pots. if they’re crabby, put them in water. if they’re unlovable, love yourself. realize HOW important it is to be a child. Go to A movie theatre in your PAJAMAS. read books out loud with joy. invent pleasures together. remember how small THEY are. GiGGle A lot. surprise them. say no when necessary. teach feelings. Heal your own inner child. learn about parenting. Hug trees together. Make loving safe. Bake A cake and eat it with your hands. Go Find elephants and kiss them. plan to build a rocket ship. imagine yourself magic. make lots of forts with blankets. let your angel fly. reveal your own dreams. search out the positive. Keep the gleam in your eye. Mail letters to GOD. encourage silly. plant licorice in your garden ! open up. stop yelling. express your love! a lot. speak kindly. paint their tennis shoes. Handle with caring.
CHILDREN ARE MIRACULOUS
from http://www.planetsark.com/eshop_products_posters_feat_02.htm

Singing to the Baby Jesus tonight – Christmas 2010.

Rick — Sat, 25 Dec 2010 18:16:05 +0000

I started a tradition of singing carols to the baby Jesus to focus on the reason of the season. Merry Christmas to my fellow Catholic Dads and to our readers. God bless you all.

My dollar store Advent wreath

Rick — Thu, 09 Dec 2010 13:33:14 +0000

It is too late to order online and too difficult to find a Catholic store open after work. But the dollar stores have everything needed to make an Advent wreath – for a buck. I got a wreath, candle stands and candles. I didn’t even use pliers to twist the wires around the candle stands and there you have it.

An Advent wreath sets the tone for the weeks before Christmas. It is a way for us to take back our season from the vendors, to overcome commercialization with spirituality. And coming closer to home, it forms our children to value not the presents under the tree but The Present from the Heavenly Father.

Advent is all about preparation and anticipation as St. John the Baptist exhorted the people to fill the valleys and level the mountains. The wreath itself is an educational tool. The circle has no beginning or end – just like eternity or God. The evergreen leaves in the wreath in the dead of Winter is life – just as Jesus Who is the Life. The four candles are the four weeks. Every week, we light one and the place is brighter. Since Jesus is the Light, the place gets brighter the closer He gets. The candles should be purple – a color of penance and royalty: penance for our sins, royalty for the King of kings. So, this little thing becomes a way to prepare to receive Jesus in our hearts as he comes during the liturgical year in a special way.

Fr. Z mentions the ways that Jesus has come as, “He came historically at Bethlehem in the fullness of time. In the liturgical year he comes to us sacramentally. He will come again at the end of the world as Judge of the living and the dead. Christ comes to us also in the two-fold consecration of the Body and Blood of Christ by the priest at Holy Mass and, in a special way in a good Holy Communion. He comes in the person of the priest, who is alter Christus, another Christ. He comes in the words of Holy Scripture. He also comes in the person of our neighbor, especially those who are in need of the spiritual and corporal works of mercy.

During Advent, John the Baptist has been reminding us in the liturgy to “make straight His paths”. When we come to the Lord in death, or He comes to us in His Second Coming, He will make straight the path whether we have during our earthly lives done our best to straighten it ahead of time or not.”

Here’s a video about Advent – as a time to slow down, prepare and anticipate.
If video fails, go to http://divine-ripples.blogspot.com/2010/12/my-dollar-store-advent-wreath.html

Man adopts 50 babies to save them from abortion.

Rick — Sun, 24 Oct 2010 15:58:56 +0000

People are made in the image and likeness of God. Some people show it more than others. Watch how this building contractor adopts unwanted babies to keep them from being aborted and used all his savings to buy a ground to bury the aborted ones. If video fails, go to http://divine-ripples.blogspot.com/2010/10/video-man-adopts-50-babies-to-prevent.html

Marian devotion – a relationship and not just a practice of piety

Rick — Thu, 21 Oct 2010 14:23:00 +0000

I wanted to instill in my family that October is the month of the Rosary. So, during night prayers, we prayed a decade on the first night, then 2 decades the next night until we ended up saying all 5. My kids’ ages are 3, 7, 8 and 10; so, I thought that would be too much for young children. But they were calm during the recitation. I didn’t have to be repressive or glare at mischief (well maybe once in awhile). In fact, when I had everyone lead decades, they were “calling it” i.e. “I call the 3rd. etc…” I still don’t want them to develop an aversion for practices of piety so, I try to maintain a certain mix e.g. on Saturday when we go to Confession, we just say a decade. The same is with Sunday because we already went to Mass.

What surprised me was the calming effect of the Rosary brought. They did not get bored or annoyed. After October, we’ll still say it once or twice during the weekdays or on the weekends when we don’t go to Confession. And when May comes along, we’ll have a floral offering to her statue in the garden while singing Marian hymns. Maybe I’ll post a video by then. We’ll make it a family tradition and that way, Mother Mary becomes more and more part of our family.

Marian devotion is the most important devotion of the Christian community. It is not only a lifeless tradition or festivity but part of the life of the Church; just how many Marian apparitions have there been since her Assumption, how many miracles were done through her intercession starting from that party at Cana. And for me, Mother Mary is not just an element of Catholic heritage. She lives and continues to intercede for us.

Recover files just like your first love – a parable from tech tips

Rick — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 20:07:31 +0000

If you internal hard disk goes bad and you had to replace it, know that there is still a way to salvage the files in there. You can get this device that connect to the hard disk and then connect it to your PC using a USB port. This device will have its own power source, so it kind of turns your internal hard drive into an external one. Chances are you’ll read some weird file names that you want to save somewhere. Then you COPY those files and save it with the extension that you think is appropriate like jpeg if those were pictures. Do NOT RENAME those files so that you always go back to them. Be sure not to reformat the hard drive if you want to recover and reinstall the system files. Reformatting wipes everything clean. If you take that path without backing up your files, then kiss them goodbye because they’re gone for good.

Now for the parable. The internal hard drive is your life with memories, decisions, ideals and inspirations. Sometimes, these get buried and blurred in the humdrum and grind of daily living. Recovering them is like what the Lord exhorts us to do in Revelation 2:4-5 “But I have this against you, that you have left your first love. Remember therefore from where you have fallen, and repent and do the deeds you did at first; or else I am coming to you, and will remove your lampstand out of its place-unless you repent.”

It was said that after ordination, the priest has a godly scent. After a few years, he starts to have an angelic scent. Then, he get the fragrance of saints. Still later, he smells like a man. Until, he sinks into the dung heap of worldly compromise and sin; that’s when he reeks.

That is why the Lord calls us to recover our first love. Do you remember your fervor during your perpetual profession, priestly ordination or episcopal consecration. Or if you’re married, do you remember what made you love your spouse – that moment when you decided that this person is the one. Try it otherwise you’re looking at a slippery slope and the Lord or your spouse doesn’t want someone tired, cynical, jaded or lukewarm.

More reflections about restoring one’s first love.
http://www.godswill-wellness.com/first-love.html
http://northwesternubf.org/2009/03/restore-your-first-love/