As dads, providers, and parents I think we’ve always struggled to do our part. But being a superhero father comes harder these days as the economy shrinks and many of our waistlines continue to expand. (For those of you who’ve seen it, the opening scene from “The Incredibles” is apropos.)

I think we’ve all faced the clear, but not sad reality that we’re not superheroes. Of course, that doesn’t mean we’re total saps either. Believing otherwise really brings down the physical and moral energy we need to help ourselves and our families. The economy is one thing, how we respond and what we do is another.

Having refused the “can’t do” attitude that I know will only feed a “can’t do” reality, I’ve decided to tackle the economy and my waistline. I’m sharing this with you guys because I think we share some of the same motivations—to be healthy enough to care for our families, able enough to provide for them and “there” enough to give them what they need. Like me, you probably wonder how you can do all these things.

The answer for me came in the form of a business proposal. I was skeptical at first because it was a home-fitness company called Beachbody which I had never heard of. Their most popular program was something called “P90X.” I’d never heard of that either.
But the man who told me about it was a member of the corporate team and a highly trusted friend.

His name is Kevin and he’s one of those increasingly rare Catholics who pays his allegiances to the Bishop of Rome. As a principal, he had given my wife her first job as a Catholic school teacher. He’s the kind of person who would offer to drop everything and drive through traffic to pick up a stranded teacher on the side of the freeway at 6:30 in the morning. I know this because my wife was that teacher.

When Kevin told me this company was for real and explained to me how it worked, I decided that I’d do it. A few months later, I started my own business with Beachbody, getting fit, helping others and making an extra paycheck.

I share this business opportunity with everyone I meet but especially with parents like you who are trying to get a grip in these slippery economic times. Let me be clear though. This is NOT a get rich quick scheme. It requires work and it may or may not be for you. But, I definitely think it’s something worth considering. It may be the flexible, at-home opportunity you’re looking for to supplement your income, although it has the potential to do much more than that. Feel free to visit my site and/or contact me for more information.

May St. Joseph be your guide.

http://www.fitnessisthekey.com/

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Most people have heard about Miss CA’s comments regarding gay marriage and the “nude” photos of her that went into circulation soon thereafter. But, as clear as it may be to some people, I’m having a hard time connecting the dots.

Seems people are trying to suggest that someone who poses for risque photos has no credibility. After all, she’s a “hypocrite” for defending one Christian value but violating another. Right? Well, that’s where I think the dots don’t come together.

How many of us can cast the first stone anyway? We’re all sinners who need a savior, right? In no way does Christianity ever hold that you can’t try to climb to high heights and fall every now and then. We all do things that violate our moral standards. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t uphold those standards, speak about them publicly, and try every day to live up to them.

My point is that it’s possible that Carrie Prejean (AKA Miss CA) is a Christian who doesn’t always practice what she preaches YET still sincerely believes she’s trying to do the right thing. The fact that people found less than virtuous photos of her reveals that she did something that violates her Christian values, but how is that relevant to her statement on gay marriage?

We all hold to higher standards than we actually practice. Sure it’s more compelling to hear a message from someone who is extremely holy and righteous. But the critical thing is we don’t make excuses when we do wrong, that we always try with our entire being to do what’s right, not that we’re perfect. Otherwise, only perfect people would be qualified to talk about their values, cause only perfect people would always live up to said values.

The only other option is if we just chuck our moral principles and then we wouldn’t have any to violate (does Fr. Jenkins of Notre Dame fall into this category…I’m just wondering…). I honestly think the media would find that more acceptable.

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Life has been like Chinese food, a little sweet and a little sour. I’m “out there” making money to support my family, but I also don’t see the people my money supports. My prayer lately is that God helps me to revise the American dream. I’m specifically requesting more time to be “present”, to be energetic, to be available, to be vital, to bring to my family the grace that comes from living my vocation the way God wants me to. That’s the only way I can see for the American Dream to make sense.

Otherwise there’s work, money, and everything else that entails. At the end of the day, if there’s enough in my energy banks, my family ends up getting the dregs. I’m sure some people out there wish they even had THAT. I recognize, of course, the idea of sanctifying work and also the more practical, “I do things away from my family for the sake of my family.” There’s a means and there’s an end.

My goal right now, though, is to marry the two. I’d rather not have finances distract my wife and I from family. But as God has ordained it, things happen the way they happen. There’s purging to be had, gold being tested in fire and all of that. So I’ll wait patiently and see how God decides to respond. Then I’ll ask him for the courage to say “yes” whether it turns out to be sweet or sour. Or both.

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Just curious if any of you are aware of a Catholic mom’s blog similar in vision and scope to Catholic dad’s…my wife and I haven’t come across any so far. Thanks for your help.

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I’ve posted (on my blog) a one question survey on dressing modestly. Please stop by and contribute your “click.” I’m quite interested in finding out how guys, Catholic dads in particular, think about the following question: Do women who consider themselves modest dressers go too far or not far enough? Your survey answer and comments are much appreciated. Thanks guys.

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You might have heard of Lawrence Kohlberg and his theory of moral development. Although I don’t necessarily agree with his formulations, he came up with some interesting “moral dilemmas.” The following is his most famous one. As dads and/or husbands we might find ourselves in similar (though perhaps less dramatic) situations. I thought it might be interesting to read and consider, through Catholic lenses, the morality of the so called “Heinz dilemma.” Here it is:

“Heinz is married to a woman who is dying of cancer but whom doctors believe might be saved by a very expensive radium-compound drug. A pharmacist in a European town where Heinz lives controls the drug and will make it available at a cost 10 times what it costs to make. Heinz cannot afford that drug, nor can he find friends who will loan him the money to buy it. After trying to convince the pharmacist to lower the price or to let him pay for it later, Heinz breaks into the pharmacy and steals the drug. The question is whther he is justified in doing so.”

For reference, these are Kohlberg’s stages: (For simplicity’s sake I just did the cut and paste job from Wikipedia.com)

Level 1 (Pre-Conventional)
1. Obedience and punishment orientation
2. Self-interest orientation
( Will I get punished? What’s in it for me?)

Level 2 (Conventional)
3. Interpersonal accord and conformity
( The good boy/good girl attitude)
4. Authority and social-order maintaining orientation
( Law and order morality)

Level 3 (Post-Conventional)
5. Social contract orientation
6. Universal ethical principles
( Principled conscience)

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Congratulations to Matthew and to all you dads currently raising, expecting, or planning children—or, God bless you, a combination of the three. My “domestic church” (currently only three members big) began in 2003. In time, we plan to expand as ideals (like fruitful love) and realities (like starving studenthood) learn to live together. In the meantime, I’ll try to describe my small but always crammed corner of the room. At times I’ll also write about the commute between the boondocks of “higher” education (at a secular university) and the haven I call home. That’s it for now. I gotta go as my “odorometer” tells me that my daughter’s diaper holds a pleasant surprise…

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