You’ve probably heard before a topic I heard at church last night: that the way you think of God the Father has a lot to do with the way you think of your earthly father. Was your father neglectful? Then, until you learn better, you may think of God as distant. Did he rage? Was he violent? Then you may fear God’s wrath and fail to grasp his mercy. Etc.
As I heard this, I watched my baby boy Liam, and wondered what he would say if he were in a conversation about this, years from now.
For one thing, I need to be careful about him hearing me yell. Last night, driving with just him and me, I made a loud noise. He was in the back, but still, he went from being fussy about being in the back by himself into his hah-hah-hah I’m-so-upset-I-can’t-wait-to-take-a-breath wail. He didn’t used to react much to things outside himself; now he does — progress, but it means I have to watch out for (for example) sneezing, shouting, or other things that are too loud.
For another, I’ve already decided, when I go by the living room and he smiles and wants me to come in, I must come in for a moment at least. I don’t want him to feel unloved. And I recognize that that’s how I felt; I must not pass it on.
And this morning, I did play with him just before leaving, and kissed Marisa and left, and he cried. What’s up with that, me not waving and saying “bye-bye”? I thought he’d cry less if he didn’t notice. He thought he’d cry less if I said goodbye. He’s getting more aware. How could I be so dismissive?
Reader Michael Krafick points us to an inspiring article about a baseball player who has left a shot at the big leagues for a shot at the REALLY big league of the priesthood.
Sometimes these messages of hope can help when facing situations that can seem more troubling. Here is what he writes.
“I thought I would submit this article in response to your latest request on Catholic Dads.
Matter of fact, my family discovered that a family relative (well loved by all of us) passed away on Tuesday. His name was Fr. Elgar and ran two parishes in Minnesota – St. John the Evangelist and St. Benedicts. Both are around 150 years old in a rural town called New Prague. He served for over 25+ years I believe. Finding a new priest willing to serve out there will be very tough, if they can even find one. It’s a shame to think such beautiful works of art (the buildings) could be closed and the congregation could be scattered. (Fr. Elgar’s Church Website – http://stjohnstbenedict.com/default.aspx).
So as much as I mourn the loss of our family’s priest, I have hope when I read this article.”
Thanks for the message, Michael. In addition to praying for Grant Desme, I will be sure to pray for your family in their time of grief, the parishioners in their time of need, and your priest relative that he see the beatific vision and God welcome him as a good and faithful servant.
This is the year for the priest, and we have had little here discussing priests and their impact on our role as Catholic dads. I am sending out a challenge to everyone to consider a post on this topic.
If you are not a Catholic Dad but think you have a post you would like included, contact me ( robk@kaiserfam.com )and if appropriate to the blog, I will post it for you.
Is anyone else bothered by the increasing amount of political content on this blog? A quick check on the “About” page shows these to be the purposes of this blog:
Providing a forum for Catholic Dads to share relevant experiences and insights
Fostering discussion on issues related to Catholicism and/or fatherhood
Identifying information resources about being a Catholic father
Providing a visible presence for Catholic Dads and Catholic Dads members in the larger online community
Nothing there about fiscal policy, war, elections, or how the Israelis are helping out in Haiti while the Arabs aren’t. Since joining this blog two years ago, I have been pretty scrupulous about posting only fatherhood related items and confining my politix to my own blog.
By their very nature, both politics and religion are very divisive. I visit this blog every day hoping to find a group of men than I can agree with on matters of religion, family, and morals, not to be aggravated by my political differences with them. It’s no secret that I’m pretty much a socialist, but first-and-foremost I’m a believing Catholic. The value of this blog is that it is a place where Catholic Dads can share their insights, thoughts, and stories, and this value is degraded when the blog merely becomes a soap-box for political opinion.
But who is the real champion of the poor and who uses them for his advantage? It is not he who kills the goose the lays the golden eggs by over-regulating the financial industry to the point that capital investment dries up and wilts the source of a dignified livelihood. It is not he who oppresses the rich in the name of justice for justice is not brought about by injustice.
For as the Lord Jesus states, “The poor will always be around.” And people like Judas will continue to feign concern to help themselves instead. The test on whether a person is truly concerned to help the poor is through the integrity of his character. It he has lied to the people before, then the chances of him lying now is quite likely.
Did Ben Benanke’s tactics avert the recurrence of a debilitating depression or did he simply delay it’s onslaught? This video suggests imply that the economic stimulus had the same effect as a shot of morphine that numbed the pain without healing the cause. Worse, it has turned us into a junkie needing fixes until we OD or hit rock bottom.
Perhaps there is a quick rehab and will get us back on our feet sooner – like a new mix of fiscal and monetary policies or a new global approach that makes markets more efficient than ever. Until that’s found, the only way out is the old fashioned cold-turkey and pick-ourselves-up-by-the-boot-straps approach.
It starts with the humbling acceptance of the truth that we messed up followed by embracing those old school values and boring life styles that values temperance over excess, patience over instant gratification, thrift over living large, saving over borrowing and discipline over letting go.
To go beyond the mundane, this renewed way of living is the classic spirituality of sacrifice, the way of the cross. The virtue of humility disposes us to be patient and put up with doing without or with less. It makes us temperate in living within or even beneath our means. Discipline is fortitude or the strength to say no or go, without fear of hardship and deprivation. This is the old school of asceticism; this is why people voluntarily take the vow of poverty. And after being mortified and purified, one enters into mysticism where sacrifice is no longer an uncomfortable state. Rather, it becomes transforming as a seed dies to sprout into a plant that will produce fruit. Or we join the Lord Jesus in His “kenosis” where He suffered and died to bring us eternal life.
Israel has more than it’s share of detractors. Wonder what the reaction of the naysayers to this would be? Here’s a tiny country that’s in a constant state of siege with it’s neighbors, routinely denounced by the UN, EU and many within this country. Yet when disaster strikes they pick up and go to help others out.
Wonder what the oil rich countries of the Islamic world are doing right now?
In this year for priests, we remember the men who give of themselves completely to build up the Body of Christ and to lead us to our Head Who is Christ. But priests are human too, and they struggle. Some struggle mightily.
Two of my classmates are struggling. I won’t name names or go into much detail, but these are men who need your prayers. One was ordained a deacon a few years ago. Shortly thereafter, he left the diocese for which he was studying and has not been in communication with them. I’ve tried to contact him to no avail. This man had his doubts throughout seminary, but took some time off and refocused on his vocation. Everything seemed to be well for some time, and then he vanished. Please pray for him.
Another situation, perhaps even more tragic, involves perhaps the brightest person in my class. He had excelled at everything he attempted academically and rose to the heights of his profession. He entered the seminary and, for a time, was applying to the Dominicans while I applied. It was always a good time to have him around. He was sent off to study, did well in his graduate program, was ordained a deacon and then a priest. And after what I’m guessing to be a year of ordination, he vanished. A priest friend of mine caught up with him. He was studying in a PhD program, pursuing further studies in his original MA concentration area (he had a BA, MA, JD, PhL, STB, and perhaps other degrees besides). I attempted to make contact with him, but have not heard back. Unfortunately, his correspondence with this priest friend of mine indicated that
Gentlemen, please take a moment and vote for the Hadley family’s research efforts. The film “Extraordinary Measures” is promoting a contest and will donate $10,000 to fund research for the winner of the contest. You can vote here. (Just click on the link and click “Continue.”)
The family’s inspirational video is here: Hadley Hope
27, of Chicago; assigned to the 782nd Combat Support Battalion, 4th Brigade Combat Team, 82nd Airborne Division, Fort Bragg, N.C.; died Dec. 18 in the Arghandab River Valley, Afghanistan, of wounds suffered when enemy forces attacked his vehicle with an improvised explosive device.
(The following is taken from www.dailysentinel.com) Albert D. Ware was no stranger to war. As a scrawny 12-year-old, he came to the United States to escape violence in Liberia, which is why his father, Thomas, got upset when he joined the Army in 2006.
He had played sports — soccer, football and wrestling — as an honors student at Corliss High School near Chicago, and the military made him even more athletic and disciplined.
In time, his family grew proud.
“He was a respectable man,” said his stepmother, Anna. “He didn’t throw a mean word to anyone. He did something with himself.”
The 27-year-old died Dec. 18 in the Arghandab River Valley of wounds from an explosive during his second tour in Afghanistan. He was assigned to Fort Bragg.
He had attended Chicago State University and Kennedy-King College before joining the Army. A colleague, Sgt. Scott Wolfe, said Ware always put fellow soldiers first and worked extra night and weekend hours to make sure they were well equipped for missions.
At home, he enjoyed cooking fufu and other West African dishes.
He and his wife, Plichette, have three children, all younger than 6: T’John, Heaven and Musu. Ware is also survived by his mother and a sister, Ciatta.
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